Weird... but FUNNY

Beforrrrrree the 'WEIRD BUT FUNNY'
HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY TO AIVIN LIMM
AND MEEEEEEEE d:


okay here goesss :D


Who says our English is teruk.?
Just see below - Ours is simple short ,concise, straight-to- the point effective etc......


WHEN GIVING A CUSTOMER BAD NEWS
Britons: I'm sorry, Sir, but we don't seem to have the sweater you want in your size, but if you give me a moment, I can call the other outlets for you.
Malaysians: No Stock.

RETURNING A CALL
Britons: Hello, this is John Smith. Did anyone page for me a few moments ago?
Malaysians: Hello, who page?

ASKING SOMEONE TO MAKE WAY .
Britons: Excuse me, I'd like to get by. Would you please make way?
Malaysians: S-kew me

WHEN SOMEONE OFFERS TO PAY
Britons: Hey, put your wallet away, this drink is on me.
Malaysians:No need, lah.

WHEN ASKING FOR PERMISSION
Britons: Excuse me, but do you think it would be possible for me to enter through this door?Malaysians: (pointing the door) can ar?

WHEN ENTERTAINING
Britons:Please make yourself right at home.
Malaysians: Don't be shy, lah!

WHEN DOUBTING SOMEONE
Britons: I don't recall you giving me the money.
Malaysians: Where got?

WHEN DECLINING AN OFFER
Britons: I'd prefer not to do that, if you don't mind.
Malaysians: Don't want la...

IN DISAGREEING ON A TOPIC OF DISCUSSION
Britons: Err. Tom, I have to stop you there. I understand where you're coming from, but I really have to disagree with what you said about the issue.
Malaysians: You mad, ah?

WHEN ASKING SOMEONE TO LOWER THEIR VOICE
Britons: Excuse me, but could you please ! lower your voice, I'm trying to concentrate over here.
Malaysians: Shut up lah!

WHEN ASKING SOMEONE IF HE/SHE KNOWS YOU
Britons: Excuse me, but I noticed you staring at me for some time.. Do I know you?
Malaysians: See what, see what?

WHEN ASSESSING A TIGHT SITUATION
Britons: We seem to be in a bit of apredicament at the moment.
Malaysians: Die-lah!!

WHEN TRYING TO FIND OUT WHAT HAD HAPPENED
Britons: Will someone tell me what has just happened?
Malaysians: Wat happen Why like that....

WHEN SOME ONE DID SOMETHING WRONG
Britons: This isn't the way to do it here let me show you,
Malaysians: like that also don't know how to do!!!!

WHEN ONE IS ANGRY
Britons: Would you mind not disturbing me
Malaysians:Celaka u

29 ways to know if you're Chinese

Please check the list to see how Chinese you really are.You will laugh at yourself when you read all of them.
1. You unwrap gifts very carefully, so you can save and reuse the wrapping (and especially those ribbons).
2. When there is a sale on toilet paper, you buy 100 rolls and store them in your closet or in the bedroom of an adult child who has move out.
3. You keep a Thermos of hot water available at all times.
4. You save grocery bags, tin foil, and tin containers. You use the grocery bags to hold garbage.
5. You hate to waste food:
( a) Even if you're totally full, if someone says they're going to throw away the leftovers on the table, you'll finish them. (Your mom will give a lecture about starving kids in Africa)
(b) You have Tupperware in your only cupboard full of used but carefully rinsed margarine tubs, take out containers, and jam jars.
7. You have a collection f miniature shampoo bottles that you take every time you stay in a hotel.
8. You wipe your plate and utensils or wash them in a small basin of hotwater before you eat every time you go to a restaurant.
9. You own a rice cooker and a slow cooker.
10. You wash your rice at least 2-3 times before cooking it.
11. You fight (literally) over who pays the dinner bill.
12. You have a teacup with a cover on it.
13. If you're under age 20, you own areally expnsive walkman if you're over 20, you own a really expensive camera.
14. You're a wok user.
15. You only make long distance calls after 7pm.
16. You prefer your shrimp with the heads and legs still attached - it means they're fresh.
17. You never call your parents just to say, " Hi"
18. If you don't live at home, when your parents call, they'll ask ifyou've eaten, even if it's midnight.
19. Your parents tell you to boil herbs and stay indoors when you get sick. They also tell you not to eat fried foods or baked goods because such food are "heaty" (yeet hay in Cantonese).
20. >You e-mail your Chinese friends at work, even though you only sit 10 feet apart.
21. You always cook too much.
22. You eat every last grain of rice in your bowl, but don't eat the last piece of food on the table.
23. You starve yourself before going to an" All You Can Eatbuffet."
24. You know someone who can get you a good deal on jewelry orelectronics, computers.
25. You own your own meat cleaver and sharpen it.
26. Your toothpaste tubes are all squeezed paper-thin.
27. You call a sausage a hotdog.
28. You wrap with napkins all the knives, spoons and forks of the airline that you fly on and put in your travel-bag as souvenirs
29. You never forget to take with you all the unused bath and facialtissues when you check out from the hotel because you believe that you have paid its all.

Now that you have read the lot, are they mostly true?